Attributed to Brian Dyson, CEO of Coca-Cola Enterprises, from a university commencement address.

Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them work, family, health, friends and spirit, and you’re keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that “work” is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends & spirit–are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same.

You must understand that and strive for balance in your life. How?

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live ALL the days of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each other.

Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find. The quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.

Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.

Don’t forget that a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.

Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.
Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift. That’s why we call it “the present.”
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The following is an excellent article by tom walsh in his Living Life Fully Ezine. If you’re interested in getting your own weekly announcement of the online ezine, visit http://www.livinglifefully.com/signups.htm and click on “E-zine Announcement”

I recently took a fairly long trip in a rented truck, one that was full of our furniture. Because it was so full, it was pretty obvious that its gas mileage was going to be even worse than it would be for such a truck. In order to save on gas, my wife and I decided that we wouldn’t go any fast than 55 miles per hours in the truck, even when the speed limit was 75. Don’t worry–we pulled over often to let people pass us when there was only one lane.

But there was something quite nice about going our own pace, even when the people around us were going much faster. We knew why we were going the speed we were, and we knew that it would serve no real purpose to go faster–it would only cost us more money without accomplishing anything that we needed.

Going at our own pace isn’t something that’s valued much in today’s culture–everything and everyone seem to be geared for speed, going faster and faster, while supposedly accomplishing more and more. I suspect, though, that of the truly fulfilling tasks that we could be taking on each day, most of us are addressing very few of them with this speed that we’re allowing to take over our lives. We go faster only because we think that others expect it of us, and we’re getting stressed and worn out accomplishing things that don’t have much lasting intrinsic value at all.

Going at our own pace allows us to do many things well. First of all, if we take on a project at a pace that’s comfortable to us, we’re going to do a much better job on it. I’ve hurried through jobs before and ended up having to go back and re-do much of them because I’ve missed a step or did something poorly that made later steps impossible. Time saved? None–in fact, I often found that hurrying through a task made me end up taking longer at it, and not even doing as good of a job.

Going at our own pace allows us to enjoy the journey. If it’s a trip, we get to see the views and really soak them in, rather than flying by them and getting a quick glance at them. If it’s a task, we get to experience each step fully for exactly what it is–a step in a process–and that allows us to learn more about the processes involved in life. Many people, especially those who study meditation, have found that taking our time with individual steps is a form of meditation that allows us to truly experience the moment, whatever we may be doing.

If I’m cooking a stew, for example, I really enjoy cutting up the vegetables, even though there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to take the time necessary for the task. I find that once I start cutting up the potatoes and celery and onions, it’s very relaxing to do so, especially when I focus fully on the task and empty my mind of other things going on in my life. I may want to get them done in a hurry, but it’s better for me to take my time. It’s better for the finished product, too, for the vegetables cook more uniformly if they’re cut to similar sizes.

When I’m running, I witness more than ever just how important it is for us to go at our own pace. If I enter a 5k fun run and I try to go out with the leader at his or her pace, then there’s a good chance that I’m not going to be able to finish the run at all. If I go too fast, I’ll burn myself out and lose my ability to continue. If I go at a pace that works for me, though, I’m going to finish the race in good shape, not too depleted but not at all fresh. If I go too slowly, then the race generally isn’t much of a workout for me at all, and since running is a form of exercise for me, going to slowly isn’t an option.

Of course, there are times when it’s inappropriate to allow your desire to go your own pace to affect others. I’m constantly baffled by the people who travel in the left lane of freeways even though they’re driving five miles below the posted speed limit. They belong in the right lane, but by staying in the left lane–even when they’re not passing anyone–they’re creating dangerous situations that can have deadly results. And if you have a deadline for a project at work, settling into a slow and comfortable pace may make you feel better momentarily, but it could have drastic results when you miss the deadline for that project or presentation.

All in all, though, I find that when I find a comfortable but challenging pace, and when I stick to that pace, I experience a lot less stress and anxiety. Life’s simply too short to spend tons of time being stressed out, so it’s important if we’re going to live our lives fully that we make decisions that will allow us to do so, and not decisions that will keep us enduring stress. I know the paces that work for me because I’ve allowed myself to experiment and try new paces, and I know that if more people would explore other paces in their lives, they could find those paces that make them more effective while going through less stress.

Note from Louise: I know this is a little long, but the way you will be touched by the end of it is well worth the read.

Story retold by Ajay Kapoor on his Peace and Love page on Facebook. Also see his website at zmeditation.com.

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: ‘When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?’

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. ‘I believe that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.’

Then he told the following story:

Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys were playing baseball. Shay asked, ‘Do you think they’ll let me play?’ Shay’s father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay’s father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, ‘We’re losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we’ll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.’

Shay struggled over to the team’s bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt . His father watched with a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father’s joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay’s team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay’s team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn’t even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay’s life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.

The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman’s head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, ‘Shay, run to first! Run to first!’ Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled, ‘Run to second, run to second!’ Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher’s intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman’s head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.

All were screaming, ‘Shay, Shay, Shay, all the way Shay!’

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, ‘Run to third, Shay, run to third!’

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, ‘Shay, run home! Run home!’ Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.

‘That day’, said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, ‘the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world’.

Young Shay would never forget what it felt like to be a hero that day.

Neither would the other boys.

“The decency of any society can be measured by how it treats its most vulnerable citizens.”

By my colleague Greg Walsh of www.gpwalshcoaching.com. Thanks for this great article on peace, Greg!.

Peace is your natural state. Actually so is happiness, contentment, creativity, compassion, pretty much every desirable characteristic. I am sure everyone has heard that from some spiritual or personal growth teacher. I am pretty sure everyone reading this believes it. But the questions invariably arises. “If peace is my natural state, why don’t I feel it?”

Great question and the answer is surprisingly simple. You don’t feel peace because peace is not a feeling.

Feelings, thoughts, sensations, experiences all come and go. Peace does not. If you look for it in feelings which come and go you will not find it. It’s not there. It is actually the background of all that which is coming and going, changing and transforming. You notice it between the thoughts, between the feelings, in the lull between experiences. It’s not that peace comes when the experience wains. It is actually there all along. You just notice it in the quiet.

So let’s not be so quick to get into the next activity, the next experience, the next thought. Take some time to enjoy a moment with your natural state. With a little bit of practice you will find that you can be in very active experiences and be aware of the presence of peace at the same time. So it is not necessary to get rid of all the varied activities of life to be peaceful. No need to move to Tibet or the forests of Thailand. You only need to see where all the experiences arise and where they subside. Against this background of your natural state. The peace which you are.

This poem by an unknown author is an extremely simple (although not easy!) guide for achieving happiness in this lifetime!

Everybody Knows,
You can’t be all things to all people.
You can’t do all things at once.
You can’t do all things equally well.
You can’t do all things better than everyone else.
Your humanity is showing just like everyone else’s.

So,
You have to find out who you are, and be that.
You have to decide what comes first, and do that.
You have to discover your strengths, and use them.
You have to learn not to compete with others, because no one else is in the contest of “being you”.

Then,
You will have learned to accept your own uniqueness.
You will have learned to set priorities and make decisions.
You will have learned to live with your limitations.
You will have learned to give yourself the respect that is due.
And you’ll be a most vital mortal.

Dare to Believe,
That you are a wonderful, unique person.
That you are a once-in all history event.
That it’s more than a right, it’s your duty, to be who you are.
That life is not a problem to solve, but a gift to cherish.
And you’ll be able to stay one up on what used to get you down.

There is much beauty and wisdom in this Native American Code of Ethics, originally published in the “Inter-Tribal Times,” October, 1994

1. Rise with the sun to pray. Pray alone. Pray often. The Great Spirit will listen, if you only speak.

2. Be tolerant of those who are lost on their path. Ignorance, conceit, anger, jealousy and greed stem from a lost soul. Pray that they will find guidance.

3. Search for yourself, by yourself. Do not allow others to make your path for you. It is your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.

4. Treat the guests in your home with much consideration. Serve them the best food, give them the best bed and treat them with respect and honor.

5. Do not take what is not yours whether from a person, a community, the wilderness or from a culture. It was not earned nor given. It is not yours.

6. Respect all things that are placed upon this earth – whether it be people or plant.

7. Honor other people’s thoughts, wishes and words. Never interrupt another or mock or rudely mimic them. Allow each person the right to personal expression.

8. Never speak of others in a bad way. The negative energy that you put out into the universe will multiply when it returns to you.

9. All persons make mistakes. And all mistakes can be forgiven.

10. Bad thoughts cause illness of the mind, body and spirit. Practice optimism.

11. Nature is not FOR us, it is a PART of us. They are part of your worldly family.

12. Children are the seeds of our future. Plant love in their hearts and water them with wisdom and life’s lessons. When they are grown, give them space to grow.

13. Avoid hurting the hearts of others. The poison of your pain will return to you.

14. Be truthful at all times. Honesty is the test of ones will within this universe.

15. Keep yourself balanced. Your Mental self, Spiritual self, Emotional self, and Physical self – all need to be strong, pure and healthy. Work out the body to strengthen the mind. Grow rich in spirit to cure emotional ails.

16. Make conscious decisions as to who you will be and how you will react. Be responsible for your own actions.

17. Respect the privacy and personal space of others. Do not touch the personal property of others – especially sacred and religious objects. This is forbidden.

18. Be true to yourself first. You cannot nurture and help others if you cannot nurture and help yourself first.

19. Respect others religious beliefs. Do not force your belief on others.

20. Share your good fortune with others. Participate in charity.

Have you ever had the experience yourself or seen someone else who has a major AHA! moment. Instead of being grateful that they have finally “gotten” it, they immediately start going down the “Why didn’t I figure it out sooner?” road. They are suddenly filled with remorse, guilt, self-anger or some other negative feeling and the magic of the AHA! moment is gone.

Why do we do that? I think it’s for the same reason that our bodies ache in the first 24 hours after seeing a chiropractor. No matter how uncomfortable it was before, our bodies always prefer the “status quo” and (like our brains!) don’t like anyone messing with it. So, being the contrary folk we are, our bodies waste about 24 hours trying to get itself back to where it was before the manipulation. For me, it usually gives up after about 24 hours and then accepts the new improved spine as the “status quo”, a fact that I am extremely grateful for. After all, I went to the chiropractor and invested the time and money because I was in pain. Why on earth would I reject that?

There are so many reasons that we didn’t figure out our AHA! moment sooner: from we were in too much resistance to see the underlying truth to not wanting to accept any responsibility to we just didn’t see it! It doesn’t really matter. Let me repeat that, it doesn’t really matter! The point to remember is that if we could have seen it sooner, we would have seen it sooner. It’s as simple as that.

I think another reason we jump on the remorse bandwagon is because we really are not comfortable with joyful feelings. An AHA! moment is a special magical time. All of sudden, all pieces of the universe (your universe, at least) are aligned together and you and it are in perfect harmony. As wonderful as that sounds, and as often as we say that’s what we want, it happens so rarely for most of us, that we try to get rid of it the same way we would if a fly landed on us. OFF! NOW!

Accept that you figured whatever it was at the exact right moment for you and your life will be so much easier. On top of that, you’ll start getting familiar with what joy feels like. And, in the immortal words of Martha Stewart, “that’s a very good thing!”

If we’re working on becoming our best self, we almost always have goals that we’re trying to manifest, as that is part of the process.

What I find really interesting is that it’s not enough to want what we want, we also have a need to manifest our desired object easily and effortlessly, yet most of us don’t really believe that is possible. I think that is because we confuse “hard work” or even “work” with “struggle”.

The primary difference between hard work or work and struggle is that one is a positive experience and the other is a negative one. We’ve all had moments when it is a complete joy to roll up our sleeves and get working on something. This is when we our desires, skills, interests, talents are all lined up and “in alignment”. Not matter what the work is, when we love it, it never feels like work.

Struggle, on the other hand, means that we are not in alignment, that one or more piece(s) of the puzzle are way off to the left, when all the remaining are way off to the right. Suddenly, the whole process becomes a tremendous effort and, sadly, has little chance of success.

What most of us don’t realize is that a big factor on whether we work hard or struggle is what we believe about how success can be achieved. For example, if you’ve been brought up on beliefs like “No pain, no gain”; “If it seems too good to be true, it probably is”; “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop”; “Nothing good comes easy” and the like, it will be very difficult for you to let yourself go and believe that you can create the good things you want easily and effortlessly.

The good news is that, if you’ve internalized all those beliefs and made them your own, it is possible to work at changing them into beliefs that support and bolster your efforts. It is surprising to me how often we have bought into the beliefs that surrounded us as a child without even being aware of them. In fact, many of us feel we have escaped what we saw as limitations our family and background suggested were “natural”. Yet, no matter how far away from that life we think we have gone, we are shocked to discover that we have the exact same beliefs underneath. No wonder why getting where you’ve gotten has been so hard.

The first step I recommend is to be open to the idea that it IS possible to create what you want easily and effortlessly. You’ll be surprised how just being willing to consider that there is an alternate way to look at life can open yourself up to “easy and effortless!”

One of the highest compliments an individual can receive is to be called a person of character — a class act! Thomas Leonard’s Class Act 100 assessment is designed to help you understand where you are along this path and to give you ideas for areas worth developing. While there are 100 points in total, I will post one section of the assessment: 10 statements under a specific category.

Hot to use this assessment. As you read each statement, circle 1, 2 or 3. A “1″ means the statement is SOMETIMES true. A “2″ means the statement is OFTEN true. A “3″ means the statement is ALWAYS true.

J. COMMUNICATION

1 2 3 Tone. I speak in warm, clear tones.
1 2 3 Dance. I can speak and hear, simultaneously.
1 2 3 Articulate. I clearly state what I want to say.
1 2 3 Clear. I speak simply. I am easily understood.
1 2 3 Appreciative. I thank people and I am sincere.
1 2 3 Congratulatory. I am truly excited for the success of others and I congratulate them.
1 2 3 Constructive. I reinforce the positive of a person; I don’t criticize.
1 2 3 Encouraging. People need encouragement and I am unstinting in my support.
1 2 3 Friendly. I like people and let them know it.
1 2 3 Expressive. My spirit, love, emotions and excitement come across when I communicate.

_____ Score (30 max)

____________________________
From The Class Act 100 Program developed by Thomas J. Leonard and Coach U, Inc. Modified by LMK.

One of the highest compliments an individual can receive is to be called a person of character — a class act! Thomas Leonard’s Class Act 100 assessment is designed to help you understand where you are along this path and to give you ideas for areas worth developing. While there are 100 points in total, I will post one section of the assessment: 10 statements under a specific category.

Hot to use this assessment. As you read each statement, circle 1, 2 or 3. A “1″ means the statement is SOMETIMES true. A “2″ means the statement is OFTEN true. A “3″ means the statement is ALWAYS true.

I. LIFE SKILLS

1 2 3 Loving. I rejoice in my love of, and the love I receive from, others.
1 2 3 Quick. I make the most of opportunities in order to accomplish my objectives.
1 2 3 Authentic. I have absolutely no “attitude” or pretense. I have nothing to sell or prove.
1 2 3 Light. Things matter to me, but I am not burdened by people, situations or life.
1 2 3 Humorous. I see the humor in almost anything.
1 2 3 Diplomatic. I seek to build relationships, even if it takes an investment of time.
1 2 3 Savvy. I have street smarts and understand what motivates people.
1 2 3 Generous. When in doubt, I share what I have.
1 2 3 Wisdom. I am very wise. I’ve learned well.
1 2 3 Perspective. I can always see the forest for the trees. I always see the bigger picture.

_____ Score (30 max)

____________________________
From The Class Act 100 Program developed by Thomas J. Leonard and Coach U, Inc. Modified by LMK.